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Dear Mom


Dear Mom, 

It's your birthday.  Mother's Day and I'd like to say thank you for a few things.

you're pretty
  1. For letting me say that my imaginary friend Jake was a real person and pretending not to know when I lied to your face about him cutting my bangs really short when I was 4 years old - yeah, that was me. 
  2. For letting me change my name to "Maria" in 2nd grade because I thought Hannah was a dumb name (and for basically saying the name you picked for me sucked.  ouch)  
  3. For not telling me that the optometrist knew I was lying when I tried to fake an eye test so I could get glasses like all the cool girls in my class.  That one really came back to bite me now that I'm 30 and can't see without my cool glasses or contacts. 
  4. For letting me be the only girl at my elementary school to try out for co-ed basketball and not being mad when I made it... and then decided I didn't want to do it. 
  5. For paying for years of piano lessons and taking me every Saturday even though you knew I couldn't read music and that I'd fake my way through my lesson playing by ear, but would still occasionally turn the page of my music book (in the wrong spots).  
  6. For singing the alto part with the radio in the car all the time. I think I could hear harmonies in my head before I could speak. 
  7. For letting me and my imagination run wild and going along with every new thing I dreamed up and wanted to become. 
  8. For saying you never had any money, but always having a secret $20 bill in your purse zipper pocket. 
  9. For telling me every day of my life that I was beautiful, especially on days when I didn't believe you.  
  10. For teaching me when to hold my tongue because sometimes silence is best.  
  11. For fixing my hair every time I cut it, permed it, crimped it, hot sticked it and dyed it.
  12. For listening to me cry when I have a broken heart.  
  13. For laughing with me when I am spilling over with happiness. 
  14. For listening to me scream and say irrational things when I'm angry. 
  15. For keeping the peace in a house full of men.  
  16. For crying tears of joy with me when I told you that you were going to be a grandma. 
  17. For coming over to give my baby his first bath because I was too scared. 
  18. For teaching me to be patient and kind and loving and forgiving. 
  19. For teaching me how to pray. 

cool stuffed dog, mom. 
corn flakes will fix anything


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